When I listened to Ruth Soukup’s “Do It Scared Podcast” and dared myself to take the even more scary quiz to find my top Fear Archetypes, I was hesitant to press that pesky submit button. Not because the quiz was long and brutal. Oh no…that part was easy. The hard reality when I got my results was the scary part. I knew I was a People Pleaser. Duh. That was a big, flashing red neon sign from the get-go. I got it. I need to learn how to say NO. Moving on…
But a Procrastinator?
Or a Victim?
After the denial phase wore off (all of about 15 minutes after hashing things out with Norma), I realized the thing didn’t lie. I fear procrastination so much that I actually procrastinate! I spend all this time planning and organizing and making sure all my ducks are in a row. You know…organizing my desk drawer for the 17th time because it wasn’t quite right the other 16 times I did it. But in my defense, my desk sure is organized! For the love… Note to self: I MUST work on that!
As for being a victim… There is so much truth there that I actually laughed. It explains SO MUCH! Everything seems to happen “to me” because of something someone else did or because of circumstances beyond my control and I’m suffering because of it! Another note to self: I’m the common denominator here!
Now that I know about this procrastination thing, I’ve gotten a whole lot more done! The drawer is going to have to wait, and my priorities are slowly getting in a straighter line. I’ll catch myself doing it, too. “OK, Kim…do you seriously need to be checking your email right now? No. I don’t. Stop procrastinating and get it done!” It’s also getting obvious why I procrastinate: I don’t really like doing whatever it is I need to do, or I’m attempting to do it when my brain is dead and I can’t muster up enough oomph to get it done. My procrastination is also prevalent when I’m scared and trying to avoid big steps I’m not comfortable taking.
I also need to start doing things to protect myself so I don’t feel “victimized” all the time. If I have no control over stuff, I need to change my own perspective! I need to get a less organized grip! And I need to start asking for help or giving better directions to the people I tend to feel victimized by (like my husband and stepdaughter). They go on their merry way after destroying the living room.. Instead of feeling like the “poor victim” who has to clean up their horrific mess (again), I just need to ASK them to clean it up [so I can stay sane]! It’s actually working! Apparently they don’t read my mind as well as I thought they could. Weird…
What are YOUR fears, and how can you do things to overcome your own harsh reality? It might really help to find out!
– Scared No More,
Kim